Ataru Mmoroboshi


Looks: It's repeatedly stated in the series that women find Ataru incredibly unattractive, yet he's not drawn with visible deformities, so I'd rate his looks as plain, marred by the drooling leer he usually greets the other sex with. His mom probably still buys all his clothes; I see him as likely to go for the disco look if allowed to dress himself.

Smarts: Not particularly bright. Tends to think with the little head, rather than the big one. Capable of low cunning, although his plans frequently contain false premises. (Such as "she's just playing hard to get.")

Personality: Ataru's most prominent trait is his lechery. Almost anything with a double X chromosone he considers a valid target, and he has extreme difficulty in taking "NO, DAMMIT!" for an answer. He's also lazy, greedy and insanely unlucky. However, he does at bottom have a sort of integrity, as seen to best advantage in the rainmaker episode.

Cooking: He's one of those unregenerate types who believe that cooking and housework are women's work. On the rare occasions he's home, he'll be parked in front of the TV (probably watching "Baywatch"), calling for a beer.

Fighting Skills: Mostly Mediocre. Frequently gets beaten up by normals. However, he's learned the sword-catching trick, and has become expert with the frying pan against Ten.

Special Abilities: Can take amazing amounts of damage and recover, high tolerance for electric shock, and a truly whopping case of lechery that's survived everything thrown at it, up to and including psychic surgery.

Competition: Lum and all other women. Lum is extremely possessive of her darling, and has the resources to make a competitor's life quite miserable if she looked serious. Also deep down Ataru is faithful to her in his fashion. Prepare to hear her name in his sleep a lot. And of course he has a roving eye, so maybe it would be best if you agreed to an "open" marriage.

In-Laws: Mother and Father Moroboshi. They've long since accepted that Ataru is a loser (there's a Yiddish word, but I've forgotten the spelling.) They will be grateful to anyone who takes him off their hands, particularly if you look "normal" and promise they'll never hear from him again.

Children: Indication is that any sons would strongly resemble him in appearance and intelligence. He'd be initially pleased with having offspring, though he's very likely to foist most of the child-rearing tasks on you.

Economics: In the old days, Ataru could have gotten a dead-end job as a faceless drone in some corporation. But with the new sexual harrassment laws in place, his employment prospects look pretty grim. Expect to be the main breadwinner in the family.

Sex: Ataru is perhaps just a little *too* eager, and is likely to be so excited that a woman finally said "yes" that premature ejaculation will occur. However, he recovers quickly, and after a few tries you should get some satisfaction too. WARNING: given his habits, STDs are likely to be a major worry in your relationship. Teach him about safe sex and get him tested frequently.

Overall: A pretty dismal choice. You can do better in your average singles bar.

Written by: SKJAM!
Converted to HTML by: Jim Franks

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