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Dark Schneider

Looks : Dark Schneider (hereafter referred to as D.S, just like he is in the manga) is certainly no slouch in this department - long, flowing white hair, lean and muscled body and a devilish grin to top it off. He also has a tendency to get his clothes blown off a lot, which might or might not count as an additional plus point. In addition to that, I guess personal charm and magnetism have to add to the appearance factor some. All in all hunk material.

Smarts : You can't be a total idiot and hope to conquer the world, you know. While not being much for the tactical aspects of combat (his approach is usually to wade in and blow the crap out of the opposition) he has on many occasions demonstrated both incredible cunning and quick thinking as well as an uncanny insight into the minds of his foes. He's also the world's most powerful sorcerer, which by default means that he'd have to have the brains to study the required arcane texts to get there.
   However, his perverted streak and flash-fire temper sometimes get the better of him - he's also impossible to reason with if anyone he loves (especially Yoko) is threatened. This shouldn't detract much from his basic level of intelligence, though - when push comes to shove, he HAS lived for 400 years and generally knows what is the right thing to do at any given time.

Personality : D.S is a law unto himself...someone who's seriously weird. An anarchist who wants to take over the world and have fun doing so, he's hotheaded, perverted as hell and probably would qualify as crazy, or at the very least extreme in a whole lotta other respects. Nevertheless, he's also fiercely loyal to his friends and has a rarely-seen kind, compassionate side. Truly one of the most unique anime characters out there.

Home Economics : None. Why would he need to? He's got near-godlike magical abilities, for goodness sake - probably would have legions of servants to do chores and cook for him if felt like it.

Combat Skills : Even without his formidable magical powers, D.S is still a force to be reckoned with - while not as good, as say, Arshes Nei or any of the samurai, he can wield a sword effectively enough and does pretty well with fists alone (has been able to pierce invisibility without magical aid) Thrown in the awesome amounts of spells he has at his disposal and you quite literally have the power of a god at your command.

Special Abilities : Aforementioned godlike magical power. You could also consider his incredible luck with the opposite sex (he gropes and gets away with it all the time, as well as having...very good fortune in some other respects) as being an ability.

In-Laws : Anthathrax, God of Destruction, the 10 Sages and Satan, possibly all the Archangels as well. Gives one pause for thought, doesn't it? D.S is not exactly *related* per se to the first two (out to kill the first and created unwittingly by the second) and Satan likely wouldn't bat an eye at you marrying his kin. The Archangels have, for the most part, their own agenda as well - Mikael's romantic attachment to D.S's other side might pose a minor problem, but chances are you'll have your hands full with...

Competition : Every female in existence, Arshes Nei and Tia Nort Yoko in particular. Let's face it, this IS D.S you're talking about here. This guy's worse than Happosai in a way - he gropes *unconsciously*, and doesn't restrict his...prey to humans alone. (Witness his first meeting with Gabriel?) As D.S himself has said, he's out to make one half of the human race happy and has absolutely no qualms about doing so - his beloved Arshes Nei tried and failed to get him to give up the idea of a harem, so you're going to have to acknowledge that a roving eye will be the least of your problems...
   Mainly because Yoko and Arshes will probably kill you first. The latter is D.S's "daughter" and they're been together for over 100 years...he literally ripped out his heart to save her from a spell once. Add that to the fact that she's one of the Four Heavenly Kings and you've got *quite* a contender for D.S's affections. (Not to mention that she's almost slavishly devoted to him already...)
   Yoko, on the other hand, took a long time to actually fall in love with D.S. Most of her affection stems from a strong relationship to his "other side" - Rushe Ren Ren (and later on, Lucifer) However, having admitted to herself that she does like him (though she hasn't said as much to D.S personally) she'll definitely fight to keep him. Like Arshes, she's not only powerful (can cast Stryver, the ultimate defensive magic, as well as resurrection spells) but has killer looks too.

Finances : Has no need for money; what he wants, he takes. With his power he could procure unlimited amounts of it if need be.

Sex : Think about it...just think about it. Now think about it again. Is your throat dry yet? ^_^
   Remember, this is *D.S* we're talking about, and in his own words - "Four at one time is no problem at all!" He's also got an under-developed sense of social properity. And one hell of a body.
   The bottom line is most probably at lot of it, with as many different people as possible, done very well. 400 years and hundreds of females under his belt should do wonders for his experience, to say the least.

Overall : Not a bad catch at all, if you possess the power and\or skills to stand up to his other lovers and don't mind his propensities in this regard. You've also got to like him for what he is (basically a semi-crazed, randy god) because D.S doesn't change for anyone. One could do worse than marrying this guy.


Written by : Zhou Tai An
Converted to HTML by : C.P.I. / ASMiNC

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